Jim and Jan tackle a topic that comes up quite a bit in leadership – ego. They discuss their definition of ego, and how it affects perception and ability to be a leader. Also discussed is the balance of confidence and humility, and how developing a feedback loop keeps our ego in check.
[4:01] The most authentic leaders seem to have a very accurate understanding of who they are and how they are perceived. There are leaders of course that operate from ego almost completely, but the authentic ones gather more trust.
[5:04] The more you see someone project their ego, the less they are actually comfortable with who they are. They are trying to be a certain way and live up to what they aren’t inside, but really want to be.
[7:42] A great leader is able to self regulate and realize it’s not all about them.
[8:44 The best supporters will put themselves to the side and listen to you intently without their own filters.
[11:07] You have to make sure your feedback loop is not corrupt. When you have power, it’s easy to have people around only telling you what you want to hear, and that takes your ego further away from where it needs to be.
[12:30] Three questions to ask yourself consistently:
- What are you doing in team meetings that is helpful?
- What are you doing that isn’t helpful?
- If you can change how you interact with the team, what would it be?
[13:51] We will always make mistakes, and we must be humble enough to be open to learning and growing.
[16:10] The anchor point for ego is in the wrong spot when our worth and identity is directly correlated to our job or a certain status.
[17:53] People put on a display when they feel intimidated, or they get so overwhelmed that they mute the beauty that is within. The real artful networker knows how to comfort others so the real inner awesomeness can shine through.
[22:17] To face your own hypocrisy, you must have humility.
[23:37] How would you describe it to someone if it was similar to a lost piece of luggage or a coat you were checking?
How to Contact Jim & Jan
- “Listening is the highest form of respect.”
- “Ask yourself – am I easy to follow?”
- “Never let your ego get so close to your position that when your position goes, your ego goes with it.” – Colin Powell
- “The peacocks are pretty, but not enjoyable and fun.”
- “The ego is not a master in its own house.” Freud