• Home
  • Episodes
  • Books for Leaders
  • About Us
    • Our Team
    • Contact Us
  • Our Sponsors
  • Blog
  • Our Newsletter
The Leadership Podcast

The Leadership Podcast

We Study Leaders

September 5, 2018

TLP114: The Art of Influence

http://traffic.libsyn.com/theleadershippodcast/TLP_114.mp3
Play in New Window Download

This week, Jim and Jan dig into the tie between emotional intelligence and sales. Organizations are moving away from manipulative tactics, and using using empathy and connection to influence others. They discuss the similarities between sales and leadership and how emotional intelligence can be learned. There are ways we can turn small talk into big relationships!

 

Key Takeaways

[3:03] There is an art to influencing that people find pleasant, rather than manipulative and pushy sales tactics.

[4:42] We live in a “me” world, and tend to think our actions have a bigger impact than they actually do.

[5:40] Back pressure is important for creating urgency or a call to action, but there’s only so much to create before you’re deemed as a royal pain. You can increase your odds not to need that one deal by having many options and activity.

[7:12] Leaders must take the time to gather feedback and assess whether something is a useful activity or is leading to a useful outcome.

[8:02] We also must understand the buying process, and how it differs from the selling process. Great influencers create the most frictionless path for buyers.

[10:33] One of the last thing that AI might learn is how to sell something, and it’s difficult the nuances of connection that comes with the bonding and chatting in person.

[14:27] The threads that make up great sellers and leaders are intertwined closely. The qualities that set people apart in both of them include self-awareness, authenticity, curiosity and an ability to truly connect.

[19:18] It’s natural to have hang-ups and walls up to protect ourselves. Jim and Jan find that the more teamwork exercises they do, the more likely people are to let these walls down and trust their group. [24:01] A few key characteristics of a strong emotional intelligence and ability to influence

  • Have an accurate self image.
  • Be authentic and comfortable in your own skin.
  • Your words should match your feelings.
  • Your actions should align
  • Ask questions

[27:55] Small talk is easier to learn than people think. Get out of your own way, and ask simple questions, then really listen to the answer.

How to contact Jim & Jan:

Quotable Quotes

  • “Everyone’s an influencer.”
  • “The real anecdote to something not closing is having more things that could close.”
  • “To have a lot of different options you need activity.”
  • “In sales you are irrelevant, and the buyer has all the power.”
  • “Forget about you, if you want to influence others.”
  • “Great relationships are critical to success in both sales and leaderships.”

Other References:

  • #101: General Stanley McChrystal on What Connects Us
  • Principles of Persuasion
  • Year Million
Jim & Jan

These are the books mentioned in Jim and Jan’s podcasts.

The Responsible Company: What We’ve Learned From Patagonia’s First 40 Years

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Responsible Company: What We’ve Learned From Patagonia’s First 40 Years
Buy now!
The Responsible Company: What We’ve Learned From Patagonia’s First 40 Years

All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten
Buy now!
All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten

Leaders Eat Last

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Leaders Eat Last
Buy now!
Leaders Eat Last

Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life
Buy now!
Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life

Dress for Success

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Dress for Success
Buy now!
Dress for Success

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Five Dysfunctions of a Team
Buy now!
The Five Dysfunctions of a Team

Plato’s Lemonade Stand: Stirring Change into Something Great

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Plato’s Lemonade Stand: Stirring Change into Something Great
Buy now!
Plato’s Lemonade Stand: Stirring Change into Something Great

Strengths Finder 2.0

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Strengths Finder 2.0
Buy now!
Strengths Finder 2.0

Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us
Buy now!
Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us

Philosophy for Life and Other Dangerous Situations: Ancient Philosophy for Modern Problems

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Philosophy for Life and Other Dangerous Situations: Ancient Philosophy for Modern Problems
Buy now!
Philosophy for Life and Other Dangerous Situations: Ancient Philosophy for Modern Problems

The Power of Habit

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Power of Habit
Buy now!
The Power of Habit

How to Win Friends and Influence People

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
How to Win Friends and Influence People
Buy now!
How to Win Friends and Influence People

The Fine Art of Small Talk: How To Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills — and Leave a Positive Impression!

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Fine Art of Small Talk: How To Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills — and Leave a Positive Impression!
Buy now!
The Fine Art of Small Talk: How To Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills — and Leave a Positive Impression!

Pre-Suasion: A Revolutionary Way to Influence and Persuade

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Pre-Suasion: A Revolutionary Way to Influence and Persuade
Buy now!
Pre-Suasion: A Revolutionary Way to Influence and Persuade

When: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
When: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing
Buy now!
When: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing

The Experience Economy

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Experience Economy
Buy now!
The Experience Economy

Everybody Lies: Big Data, New Data, and What the Internet Can Tell Us About Who We Really Are

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Everybody Lies: Big Data, New Data, and What the Internet Can Tell Us About Who We Really Are
Buy now!
Everybody Lies: Big Data, New Data, and What the Internet Can Tell Us About Who We Really Are

The Wisdom of Crowds

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Wisdom of Crowds
Buy now!
The Wisdom of Crowds

Man’s Search For Meaning: The classic tribute to hope from the Holocaust

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Man’s Search For Meaning: The classic tribute to hope from the Holocaust
Buy now!
Man’s Search For Meaning: The classic tribute to hope from the Holocaust

Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter
Buy now!
Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter

The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference
Buy now!
The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference

Let’s Get Small

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Let’s Get Small
Buy now!
Let’s Get Small

The Spirit of Leadership: Optimizing Creativity and Change in Organizations

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Spirit of Leadership: Optimizing Creativity and Change in Organizations
Buy now!
The Spirit of Leadership: Optimizing Creativity and Change in Organizations

The Power Paradox: How We Gain and Lose Influence

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
The Power Paradox: How We Gain and Lose Influence
Buy now!
The Power Paradox: How We Gain and Lose Influence

Grandstanding: The Use and Abuse of Moral Talk

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Grandstanding: The Use and Abuse of Moral Talk
Buy now!
Grandstanding: The Use and Abuse of Moral Talk

THE COMPASS SOLUTION – A GUIDE TO WINNING YOUR CAREER

Buy This Book Online
Website
THE COMPASS SOLUTION – A GUIDE TO WINNING YOUR CAREER
Buy now!
THE COMPASS SOLUTION – A GUIDE TO WINNING YOUR CAREER

Leaders: Myth and Reality

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Leaders: Myth and Reality
Buy now!
Leaders: Myth and Reality

Dying for a Paycheck: How Modern Management Harms Employee Health and Company Performance and What We Can Do About It

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Dying for a Paycheck: How Modern Management Harms Employee Health and Company Performance and What We Can Do About It
Buy now!
Dying for a Paycheck: How Modern Management Harms Employee Health and Company Performance and What We Can Do About It

The Littlest Green Beret

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Buy from Amazon Kindle
Buy from Audible.com
The Littlest Green Beret
Buy now!
The Littlest Green Beret

Thinking Fast & Slow

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Buy from Audible.com
Buy from Amazon Kindle
Thinking Fast & Slow
Buy now!
Thinking Fast & Slow

Radical Candor: Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Radical Candor: Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity
Buy now!
Radical Candor: Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity

Leadership BS

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Leadership BS
Buy now!
Leadership BS

Team of Teams

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Buy from Audible.com
Buy from Amazon Kindle
Team of Teams
Buy now!
Team of Teams

Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion

Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion
Buy now!